unbending determination to rise above the
obstacles ahead
in her path. You just know that she is going to
make it, even
against all odds.
She is quite intelligent, in a very practical way.
Her
approach to life is extremely effective. She has
made accurate
connections between her view of life, which is the
cause, and the resultant quality of her life. And
then she
demonstrates practical intelligence by acting on
her learnings.
When you think about it, you also sense something
else
in this person. She is wasting little or no time
building a
case to blame someone, or something else, for her
life. This
frees her up to focus her energies forward to
design her destiny.
No wonder she is an optimist. She is going places.
A person with highly developed practical
intelligence is
taking his or her life circumstances, and molding
them with
a workable mental attitude to move their life
forward. This
person is finding ways to live life, to actualize
their possibilities,
rather than accumulating ways to blame life.
Compare her to the person who hasn’t developed
his
practical intelligence. He is continuously down
and out. He
is still "stuck" on either other people,
(which he may refer
to, as something similar to "rats") or
other events (which
they describe as horrible, awful, terrible) in his
life. He even
elevates these people, or events, to the level of
being the
"cause," the undisputed source, of what
he is still helplessly
going through today. Its almost as if he is saying
underneath,
"If only it weren’t for this or that, I
could be successful
and happy!"
The strain on his troubled face reveals the pain
of carrying
this heavy baggage of blame with him. You are
becoming
a little less quick to agree to help him lift his
weighty
worries. You tried that before when you agreed
that he is
justified in his anger or pain. Yes, he was
"done in!" And
perhaps you noticed that your agreement only added
further
support to his immobility.
Of course, he has a right to feel pain, anger,
persecution
or whatever he is feeling. The issue here is not
is he justified
in his anger or hurt. The question here is,
"is it wise? Does
blaming something or someone else help him? Will
he
grow? Will he get over it, and bring on a new
day?" Not as
long as he is blaming.
You can help. How? By assisting him to develop his
practical
intelligence. By encouraging him to put his blame
baggage
down. And then to go forward. You can help him to
stop blaming, and to start living.
People who spend their time blaming, rather than
creating
a new life direct their thoughts, feelings and
energy to
dwell on the useless. Practically, that isn’t
very productive.
Instead of learning from the experience, and
moving forward
enriched, they consume their present life in
unproductive
seething and hurt. You notice that the theme in
their life is,
"If only it weren’t for……….., then I
could have………..!"
The theme has become such a part of their life
that it
just never occurs to them that it was neither the
event, nor
the person that "caused" them to be
stuck, hurt or angry.
Rather, the person who has developed their
practical intelligence
is aware that it was their belief that, "If
it weren’t
for…………!" that is causing their
misery. They know that
when we blame someone or something else for our
unhappiness,
we, at that moment, give our power away to that
person or event. Then, we have to wait for these
powerful
forces that pull our string to change. That
approach is neither
empowering, wise or practical.
We only have two and one half billion seconds of
life to
live. How many of these seconds do we want to use
up consumed
in helplessness, or revenge to one other person,
in
this huge world of six billion people? At some
transforming
moment, we gain the life changing awareness that,
"Even if
no one in my life changes, and even if I had this
horrible
past, I can take charge of my life, right here in
this powerful
moment called now."
How do we develop our practical intelligence
quotient,
and bring our power back to you? How do we find
our center?
By stop blaming, and start living!
